I can't get no sleep....

When you get pregnant people like to laugh and tell you how you will never sleep again. You laugh back and think, "well I'm sure I can cope on a little less sleep. After all, I get up to go to work fine after a late night". 

Hahahahahahahahaha

You soon realise that they actually mean it when they say you won't sleep. The first month is generally spent in a total fog as you occasionally grab a nap. (If it's your first child. If you already have a toddler, you're stuffed, mate). As they get older people like to ask about the sleeping. Now, either everyone else's child slept through fine from very early on  :o(  or they are all lying. I'd like to think it was the latter. Olivia woke every TWO hours until she was about 14 months old. she started sleeping longer and longer but was nearly two before she 'slept through' in the way that people mean.

So - you'd think i would be prepared for it all. But NO. By some incredibly cruel trick of nature I had forgotten how brain crushingly awful the sleep deprivation was. I spend most days in a fog and generally feeling guilty that I should be doing things but am TOO TIRED to do anything. Some days I can barely remember my own name. 

Olivia has also decided that she doesn't want to go to sleep in the evenings so often is running about, in and out of her room. The other night Mr K was trying to get her back into bed...."It's not funny" says he in his best stern daddy voice. "It's a bit funny" says the eldest Knibblet giggling like a loon. Yes if you're two I suppose it is.

I have found the way to cope with this is to lower all expectations. I came to the realisation when Olivia was about 1ish that I will probably never have a decent night's sleep again. Once I accepted this it made it all the more easier as I stopped thinking this was the night I would sleep.

Ah well. Sleep is for the weak anyway. ;o)

Family life

It's been a while...again!

So it's been ages again. The laptop broke and I wasn't very well during the end of my pregnancy. Anyway. On 27th October 2010 at 4.30pm Madeleine Ada Knibb entered the world after a short 2.5 hours of labour. She was born in the water pool at home. She fed straight away and all was well. At 6 weeks old she came down with bronchialistis and a nasty chest infection so we spent a week in hospital which wasn't very pleasant but she is recovered fairly quickly and is all fine now with no lasting problems. She is now a chubby, giggly, bright-eyed 12 week old.

I didn't go out for a week after we got home as I was a bit worried about her catching another cold and then it snowed...and then it iced over. So for nearly two weeks we were unable to leave the house as we were surrounded by an ice moat. Mike parked his car around the back and braved it to get to work and eventually I had to brave it to go and stock up on food...it was 23rd December after all and a bit of plain pasta for Christmas lunch wasn't appealing!

Christmas was lovely. I had my mum, nan, David and Emma over so they ll took turns (fought for) holding the baby and entertaining Olivia. There was a minor mishap when Mike was draining the potatoes and tipped them all ito the washing up bowl but that was quickly remedied. (Err by making a new batch, not fishing them out!) Dinner was lovely - even if I do say so myself and generally it was a relaxed, enjoyable day.

I've started the new year with lots of plans for 2011. I want to get fit and in shape...not only for health reasons but also so I can fit back into my clothes. Nothing fits and I'm loathe to buy new stuff when all I need to do is a bit of tummy/thigh toning. I also want to properly get back to writing and put plans in place to start working freelance. I am due back to work at the end of September but three days working will require six days nursery payments so the cost for childcare will swallow up all my wages. If I had a proper career it would be worth it for a while to keep up with things but my job is no longer satisfying me as it used to so I need to think of changing now. My strengths are in copy-editing/writing and proofreading so I will concentrate on that and commercial writing whilst writing fiction in the bckground in the hope that I can be brave enough to try and get something published. And strong enough to take the inevitable knockbacks.

So that's us up to date for now. I'm going to post some photos from the last few months.
xx

Insomnia

These past few weeks, the heat combined with my 4676548 nightly toilet visits have had me staring at the ceiling while the minutes loudly tick by in my head. It has brought to mind a poem I wrote many years ago when a diet of chocolate and caffeine had the same effect.

Alone at night,
I lie in my bed,
And listen for sounds.
Is everyone dead?

Admittedly this was written in the days preceding Mr K, a wriggling toddler and a small cat that streeeeetches. These days I can only dream of an entire bed to myself. Well, I would possibly dream of such a thing…if I could sleep!

My Life in Haiku

It's been a fairly mundane week of the usual merry-go-round of work, cooking, fighting against the tidal wave of laundry and dishes and a parenting style that can best be described as benign neglect. (Read: too many biscuits too little discipline). I've been thinking about haiku recently, probably my favourite poetry form. If only my life could be contained in a short, succinct way instead of the over spilling barely-organised chaos that working five days a week has reduced it too. So, here is a summary of my week in haiku form.

Oh beautiful bump
Growing steadily each day;
Heartburn, you kill me.

Out, out dirty dust,
Futile is my constant chase
You settle the next day.

Fruit, veg, five a day
I strive for better eating,
Does chocolate count?

Oh the joyous joy,
Of bathtime with a toddler
Bathroom needs flood gates.

Work; same time each day,
Working hard to pay the bills.
Taxman you rob me.

Garden of delights,
Or haven for wildlife.
It's all perspective.

Relaxing

Shell Angel